State of Wonderment

Honesty tonight February 12, 2009

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My eyes are burning
and threatening tears
Are You there?
Do You care?
I sigh as I hear nothing
Knowing I have probably
pushed Him so far out
to the limits
of my self-built
“safety zone”
“He isn’t safe,
but He’s good.”

I fear the silence
Not wanting to be honest with myself
why I do
I fear I won’t hear You
I fear I’m alone
So I fill every orifice
with clutter
and noise
to drone out my fears

Til I’m deaf

The last thing I want to be

Deaf to You

And my heart breaks.

~Me